Happy Thanksgiving Day Loves!

This will be a short post as I know many of you are enjoying your time with your family and friends. I love the Thanksgiving holiday.  Not only is it a great time to enjoy some food that I personally feel should be offered all year (I mean who couldn’t eat turkey and dressing everyday?! And carrot cake? Ooh what about the banana pudding and ham and mac-n-cheese and green beans and the sweet potato pies – oh heavens – those sweet potato pies! I can taste them now. Ooh and do ya’ll like german chocolate cake? It’s one of my favorites and…wait, is this a food blog post? Haha.  My apologies – I tend to get carried away when I start thinking about all of the delicious food that I’m about to partake in lol.  But anywho, let me get myself back on track here…)  

Typically, I write a post every Thanksgiving to remind us all of what we ought to be thankful for.  My post last year was a great one to truly get you to think of how you could’ve been a statistic but yet here you are, still living and breathing on your own.  I encourage you to read that and share if you have time. It’s a short one and will truly have you thinking how much worse your life and life’s situations could be for you.  You can find that post here.

This year, however, I just wanted to share a quick Thanksgiving poem that I saw posted online that can summarize everything we ought to be thankful for in a few short words.  I hope you all have a great Thanksgiving Day enjoying the time spent with family, loved ones and friends.  And remember, in all things, give thanks!

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Until next time,

~V.Davis

Loving the Skin You’re In

“God has a way of reminding us that what we think is an ugly imperfection about ourselves, he intended to be beautiful.” ~Videllia Davis (that’s me lol)

Have you ever seen the movie Shrek? It’s marketed towards a child audience (though I don’t know why lol) but really, all of the subtle innuendos in there are only things that an adult would understand. I know because now that I watch the movie at 28, I see it so differently than I did when it first came out 14 years ago.shrek

So I was watching the movie a while ago and there’s a part in the movie where the other
princesses tell Fiona that she may start to let herself go and the gingerbread man chimes in and screams, stretch marks! It cracks me up everytime.  Except this time, it made me think differently.

Too often do we look at ourselves in the mirror and find something that we dislike about ourselves. For some, it may be stretch marks. For others, it may be the size of your nose or the lack of fullness in your lips. For others, it may be the lack of a derrière (that’s a donk for those that don’t know lol) or big boobs. Still, for others, it may be the length and texture of your hair, the melanin (or lack thereof) in your skin, the blemishes on your face, and so forth.

The list goes on. For me, I struggled growing up accepting the size of my lips. I was a little-skinny Olive Oil of a kid with humongous lips (if you haven’t been able to tell already from the pics of my 2site lol I’m including a silly pic here just so that you can see – they are HUGE!). That insecurity caused me to shy away from wanting to take pictures. I felt I needed to hide myself because I was that big-eyed, bubble lip child that so often got picked on (kids are so cruel at times!). However, when I entered high school and ultimately college, I learned to not place so much power in my insecurity. My college roommate’s mom always told me that she wished she had such full lips.  Further, my lips became one of my most attractive qualities to a man (now granted some of them were only attracted to them because of their own inappropriate sexual thoughts but still lol – God has a way of reminding us that what we think is an ugly imperfection about ourselves, he intended to be beautiful – whoa! I just shouted – thank you Jesus for that revelation) Fact of the matter is, I did (and do) naturally have big full lips. So I could either shy away from it or straight own it! I’ve chosen the latter.

And I’ve chosen to do that in other areas of my body too. I went natural 2 years ago and yes I will be the first to say that this natural texture can be rough at times (geesh!),  but I walk around still feeling flyy because it is still apart of me.

Even more I used to be shy about wearing bikinis. I have a few tiny stretch marks on my thighs (yep just put all my business out there lol). Although they are tiny and often unnoticeable, I knew they were there. But then I woke up one day and realized that I couldn’t change them! So I could continue to shy away from showing them or just live my life and not care…again I chose the latter. (And for any lady out there struggling with accepting this part of her body let me assure you that a man is not bothered by a stretch mark, hunty let me tell you! 😉😘)

I know I’m writing this to you and making it sound like it’s such a simple thing to do – you know accepting yourself? However, I will be the first to admit that accepting what you think is a flaw about yourself is not always easy but  you CAN do it.

Whenever I struggle with my own insecurities, I read these two verses over and over again:

“I praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made, your works are wonderful, I know that full well.” ~Psalm 139:14
“My darling, everything about you is perfect and even your flaws are beautiful to me” ~Song of Solomon 4:7

I just kept saying it until I actually believed it. I even wrote the scriptures down on a piece of paper and posted them in my room where I could wake up and see them everyday.

Then one day I didn’t have to read them. why? Because I was finally living them. I was finally living like a woman who knew her worth in Jesus surpassed any flaws or insecurities she thought she had.

What areas of insecurity are you struggling with today? Remind yourself of WHOSE you are and encourage yourself out of your insecurity and into self-confidence!!!

I’m praying for you my sister…

-V.Davis

Signed, Superwoman

Dear Superman,

superman

Wow.  I remember when I first met you.  You were like that superhero that every girl wants.  Without hesitation you swooped in and saved the day.  You rescued a damsel in distress and saved me from my pain.  You replaced the tears with laughter.  You replaced the insecurities with confidence.  You were my Superman.

But over time, the kryptonite that so ensued you began to leak over into my own life.  I could now see you for who you really were:  Clark Kent.

Not Superman.  But just another ordinary guy.  A guy who appears to have super powers but in reality is human just like the rest of us. A guy that can and will make mistakes.  A guy that didn’t truly deserve so much credit for my happiness.

Now that I’ve seen you for your reality, that fantasy that so carefully played in my head no longer exists.

You didn’t save me.  God did.  You weren’t the source of my laughter or replaced tears.  I had finally received my healing.  You didn’t make me confident.  I finally woke up and realized my worth.

superwoman1

Wow. So the reality is, it was really ALL GOD and ALL ME that got me to this place that I’m in today.  But for so long, I had given you all the credit.  I had epitomized you to be this great man of power, this great superhero that deserved credit for the woman I am today. When, in fact, I’ve discovered that the real superhero lies within me.

I pushed past the pain.  I pushed past the tears. I pushed through the healing stages and the ups and downs that come with that. I pushed through the insecurities. I pushed through the feelings of a lack of self-worth. I pushed through towards confidence.

Yes…the real superhero has been me this whole time. The hero has been within me, within my own heart. Now that I know that, your acceptance or approval is no longer needed, wanted or sought after.

And now here I stand before you. Bold and confident in my God. Bold and confident in my worth. Bold and confident in who I am as a woman.  Bold and confident knowing that you nor any other man will be able to break me.

I stand as Superwoman.

To all my other superwoman out there, be reminded of this:

“When you’ve felt all hope is gone, look inside you and be strong.  And you’ll finally see the truth.  That a hero lies in you.” ~Mariah Carey

Signed,

A Superwoman

superwoman

This letter is dedicated to all the Superwomen out there who have had to push past the pain of every hurt that they ever felt from any man. It is not meant to bash men but to help us, as women, learn to place our hearts in God’s hands and not man’s hands. You keep pushing my sister and rely on that true strength that comes from within and always know that you can overcome ANYTHING. There’s a hero that lies in you.  ~Videllia Davis

(All pictures were found using Google and are not my own.)

God’s Amazing Love

“I think God will sometimes allow random people to say and do things to you that are exactly what you need just to show you that he loves you and he hears your prayers.  My heart smiles at God’s awesome randomness in my life.” –V.Davis

20150912_130947I wrote that quote on my Facebook page two nights ago as I took a trip back down memory lane.  I’m sharing it with the world now to give someone out there hope that God hears you.  He knows your every need.  Maybe you need a comforter during your time of bereavement. Maybe you need an encourager to motivate you to your next platform in life. Maybe you just need someone to stand there and wipe the tears from your eyes.  Maybe you want someone to hold you and take away the stress of life’s ups and downs.  Maybe you need someone to cheer you on from the sideline, saying, “yes you can do it”.

Whatever it is that you need, HE already knows.  And sometimes he will give you those things.  It won’t always come in the form or shape that you would expect but when it does come, you will know that it’s GOD.

I had been praying over the past few weeks. I had been praying that GOD helps heal my heart of brokenness and pain and in its place restore my forgiveness of people, my faith in HIM and my confidence in my worth. As with most of us, I never fully ever understand the “why me, Lord”; instead, I’ve just learned to accept the “well, why not me Lord”?  I mean, who am I that I shouldn’t experience any suffering in this world?

And then BAM. It happened. Just as the sun peaks up over the horizon before its dancing rays illuminate our dark and despair-driven land, my world too got a little brighter.  It caught me completely off guard.  Through another, God reminded me that my heart can be full of laughter and smiles and warmth.  That I do not and no longer have to live in brokenness and unforgiveness.

HE reminded me that my Faith in HIM IS fully restored. All I have to do is believe. And boy, when I believed, I saw a prayer be answered almost immediately.

Through several, he showed me that my worth is seen among people.  And it’s valued. And it’s respected.  That “God took an extra minute to create me” to show me that I am fearfully and wonderfully made. That I am HIS masterpiece.

We often wonder what does the voice of God sound like. Well I heard from him.  He didn’t sound like something scary or booming like thunder (sidenote – why did people tell us that thunder was God’s voice as a child? Was I the only person that grew up like that? Our parents were just trying to get us to shut up lol… Anyway, I digress…).  He sounded just like you and me.  Partly because he was speaking to me through the mouthpiece of someone else.  I thank God for the willing vessel(s) in my life that have allowed God to use them to remind me of the things that I sometimes forget but that my soul longs to hear.

And in return, I too, want to be a vessel to tell you that you ARE fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalms 139:14a). You ARE God’s MASTERPIECE (Ephesians 2:10).  You ARE beautiful. You ARE handsome.  You CAN do it.  You WILL make it. You ARE great.  You WILL love again.  This pain will NOT last always.  Joy WILL come in the morning. You ARE successful.  You ARE forgiven. Your prayers ARE heard.  But most of all, I want to tell you that YOU ARE LOVED BY GOD.

And being reminded of all of that, now I can’t stop smiling.  What an amazing feeling it is to know that you are loved by God so much that he will use willing vessels/people to remind you of just how great you are!  I hope that in this short blog, I’ve been able to remind YOU of how great you are as well and that you too can walk with a smiling spirit.

Hugs, kisses and many blessings,

-V.Davis

“Closure” is Overrated!

“Closure is a process by which people allow themselves to get caught up in because they are too afraid to let go” ~V.Davis

So the year was 2015 and I ended a situation with a guy.  Discovered he had a whole relationship going on with someone else (smh lol).  I called my cousin to tell her what happened and she asked me did I get a chance to ask him the questions that I wanted? Did I get a chance to get closure?

Sure I wanted to know how long he had been with her, when did it start, why did he start talking to me in the first place, and why didn’t he respect me or her but what good would any of those answers do?  It wouldn’t change the fact that he was with her right now, in this very moment.

So I told my cousin the following statement:  “closure” is a process by which people allow themselves to get caught up in because they are still too afraid to let something or someone go.

closure 3

And I wasn’t afraid.  Over the years, I had learned my true value, worth and identity in Christ.  Therefore, I loved myself more than I liked this guy so I chose to end it.  (That and the fact that I didn’t need any other woman trying to come attack me because her man was being trifling lol).  I  mean yeah I had a ton of “what-ifs” and “how-could-you-do-this-to-me” type of questions but the answers to those questions wouldn’t change the fact that I still needed to end it (lest I lived life as a side chick and I am far too worthy to be anyone’s side chick! If you didn’t know, you better ask somebody!).

You see, I don’t allow myself (anymore) to get caught up in this idea of “closure”.  I’ve taught myself how to let go of people and things without feeling the need to go through this arbitrary process that will still only leave me clinging and holding on to something/someone who isn’t good for me.

I mean think about it. How many people do you know have ended something with someone and they are like I need closure? And so to get that closure, they go to great lengths to try to see that person one more time or call them one more time.  Child please!  The only thing that seeing or talking to that person one more time does is just create more questions for you.

Continue reading ““Closure” is Overrated!”

I’m Back!!!!! Refreshed and Renewed!!!

Whew…I haven’t been on here in awhile.  I needed to take some time for myself.  You know, too often we get so caught up in life and doing this, that and the other that we never just make time to live.  That’s what’s happened to me.  I was so busy completing my “to-do” list that I wasn’t leaving.  I was:

-going to church

-volunteering at church

-volunteering in the community

-writing my blog once a week

-working on my book

-planning the family reunion

-planning our next girls trip

-and working 70+ hours a week!!!

I just found myself wearing too many hats that eventually it completely drained me!  So I decided to take a break. I took a break from volunteer activities, planning trips and even blogging once a week.  And you know what? These last 2 months off have been exactly what I’ve needed!  I have been able to rest and get my creative writing juices flowing again.  Most of all, I was able to LIVE.  And LIVE I did!!! (If I’m to be honest, I’ve probably lived just a little too much in these past few months lol).  However, during this time off, I’ve learned a lot more about myself, my relationship with Christ, my value/worth as a woman and I even went on some more fun dates to tell you all about (haha).  I’m excited to be back and get back to blogging so stay tuned…many fun, exciting and inspirational stories lie ahead…

Signing off (until next week)…

-V.Davis